A Story of An Elm Tree

Apologize

I’m holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
I’m hearin what you say but I just can’t make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you’re sorry
Didn’t think I’d turn around, and say that…

It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
I said it’s too late to apologize, it’s too late

I’d take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it’s nothing new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it’s turning blue, and you say…
“Sorry” like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I’m afraid…

It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
I said it’s too late to apologize, it’s too late

Bridge (guitar/piano)

It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
I said it’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
It’s too late to apologize, yeah
I said it’s too late to apologize, yeah-
I’m holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground…

Message:

I had a bad dream about you. Thus dropped u an sms this morning. I have nothing to say anymore.

Message:

11 days to 22, but i am still not ready to talk or write anything today.

Edwin,

Thanks for loving me. I love you too but I cannot understand how you can keep unanswered questions and thoughts about things within you for so long when we make effort to talk to one another almost everyday. This is the part that really scares me Edwin.  

I know you will be upset when i choose not to talk to you. I am sorry because i cannot convince myself till now the reason and the point of speaking to you coz it seems to me there is no difference it will make now if we skype or not.  

I’m sorry.

Fionna

 

Dear ,

13 days to your birthday . This is a special day ; because its the first time i get upset with us.

In a way, i want you to know how happy i am to have you as co-investor ; i have to be frank i am upset by the fact you choose not to ask me ; since the day i shared this idea with you; till i pop the question yesterday on the role you like to play.  I can allow you to take time to think through this before you ask me, what i am distressed ( even till now) is your decision of not asking me and waiting for me to ask. It affects me; and  where it concerns things that makes a difference for this relationship ( even a simple gesture to cook a simple dinner ) , delayed words are not welcomed. I would prefer the idea of not having to say and ask for something all the time , with a “noted” reply msn or sms. I can’t expect you to know what i want at all times but the least i expect is truth saying. I do not like the feeling of you keeping to yourself something about us or things you have questions on.

I hope to understand why you would prefer to delay your words and feelings at time..i don’t know. 

I just know i am affected and you need to know. I don’t know how i can go on trusting us about how you feel at times about us. I really don’t know. I have made a choice to be upset today even though it is supposed to be something happy for us ( that its a step of moving forward for the 2 of us).

MEssage:

I have shared with you before ; i value open communication. If you choose to keep things to yourself, have secrets , i am perfectly ok because couples should have their own secrets. What i do not appreciate is the “keep to myself” attitude to share your thoughts at all .

Timing do make a difference to things that matters to the heart, when the moment and opportunity to say something is gone, it’s over.

Value of the delayed words spoken ( though a kind gesture) = Zero

 

 

Dear bbe;

My type was so true. I really needed this daily renewal to keep me committed to our love and relationship. I do that, not everyday, but at times when i feel i needed confirmation that you are the one for me and how much i want to cherish and treasure our relationship; for the things you do for me, and more importantly how much trust i place on this relationship.

I realised this very act of daily renewal gives me the power to stay committed to our love ; esp at times when i feel i needed you, and u are not by my side.

My gf asked me if this was something that came out because i needed to convince myself the reason to stay in a relationship with you , wouldn’t it be very sad if i had to be in a realtionship that i have to keep convincing myself to stay in; am i not comfortable in this love?

I thought about it for a long time. The answer was “no”.  I love you for the trust you give to me, the love you shower me with ; the planning and decision making we can discuss to one another; nd the respect we show to one another. All this was enough to make me decide why i begin this relationship with you at the first place. Thus, i am willing to commit myself to you. But being a person who has never feel the need to commit, i made a choice to commit to you; and this love. I can’t do that overnight ; and it’s especially hard when u are not around, this daily renewal is the step by step path to commitment .

Message of the day:

I am happy to be committed to thei relationship with you. I can’t describe to you how happy i was when you agree to us investing together for a house here in Shanghai. To me; it was a special moment and we have just moved our relationship to another level up.

Love you baby!

Fionna

 

Dear BB Fionna,

This is my prayer:

To be closer to you.
To be close to you physically.
To be close to you emotionally.
To be close to you to hold your hand.
To be close to you to hug you.
To be close to you to cheer you.
To be close to you to support you.
To be close to you to serenade you.
To be close to you to cook for you.
To be close to you to iron for you.
To be close to you to wash your clothes.
To be close to you to smile at you.
To be close to you to laugh with you.
To be close to you to watch movies with you.
To be close to you to watch you sleep.
To be close to you to grow together.
To be close to you to love you.
To be close to you.

I love you, dear.

BB Edwin 

Message of the Day :

“I do promise…to hold you and to cherish you. I do promise to be there in sickness and in health. I could say till death do us part but i wont, those vows are for optimistic couples..the ones full of hope. and i do not stand here on my wedding day, optimistic or full of hope…
 
i am not optimistic, i am not hopeful…i am sure, i am steady and i Know. i’m a heart man, i take them apart, i put them back together, i hold them in my hands. I am a heart man. so this i am sure…you are my partner, my lover, my very best friend. My heart, MY heart beats for you…and on this day, the day of our wedding, i promise you this. I promise you… to lay my heart in the palm of your hands…i promise you…Me.
 

Apparently this wow from Grey Anatomy was voted by Chiangwei & Zilin for being the wow that will even make a macho man go soft on his knees.

It is approx 20 mins into the show.

 
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzIxNDgxNjA=.html